They were rejecting my version of 'the boyfriend'.I was slowly realizing, that playing the boyfriend was a dead end, had always been a dead end, and i... I ever wanted something like long-term happiness I'd have to be honest with them and myself. I'd have to learn how to be myself, which was a weird thought. I wonder if I could practice somehow. Maybe go out to bars and see what it felt like to 'be myself', I guess.Ugh.Not long after I found out about masturbation, and then the internet, I. She pushed away from me for a moment. "Are you telling me the truth about being a virgin?" "Yes, yes, I am. I swear. Why on earth would I make that up? I watch some videos and they...." my words just sort of trailed off and I felt I was exposing too much of my private life to someone who was pretty much a stranger. "I see. It feels very good. Just do it a little more gently and then gradually increase the pressure," she said and kissed me for a little longer. When it came time to actually. The difference only showed in situations that in some way could stress her. Then, her special, protected world kept the intruding emotions out. That was how she handled the nudity. Essentially, she just acted as if she was not naked. Nothing was wrong, so nothing could cause her stress, fear, or guilt.A consequence of Rachel's detachment about her nudity was that every male in the place fell in love with her. She was very attractive, and the natural serene way that she went about her life just. I collected both coffee mugs and went to kitchen to wash them. Dada followed me. As I was washing them, he put his arms around my waist from my back, hugged me tightly, kissing me on my head and neck. Then lift his hand and held my breasts, pressing and squeezing. Then door bell rang. He told me to go to my room as I was wearing semi transparent nightie. I obey the order and went to my room. I stand behind the door. Dada opened the door. Jay entered in the hall and informed dada that his mother.
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