It started when I was fourteen. The family was going to Hawaii the week after Thanksgiving for a two-week stay. God, but was I ever up for it. Two wee...s on sunny beaches that would be wall to wall with gorgeous babes in bikinis. A true masturbator's paradise, except that I didn't go. Two days before we were scheduled to leave I slipped on a patch of ice, fell down two flights of stairs and ended up with my right leg broken in two places. The hotel and the airline tickets were prepaid and. 9 grade point average, though I knew that it would do little good. My mother expected perfection and would not be satisfied with anything less. "I will do better," I told her instead. The dinner was excellent, though the dinner conversation was less than pleasant. Most of my mother's polite conversation was similar to the comment about my grades, pointing out things that I could have done better and showing her general disapproval. "Your father would be ashamed," she told me with a scowl after. Now this is the part of the story where I suppose you expect me to launch into the Cinderella story. How I fell in love with this ugly duckling and by the power of my love alone, transformed her into a diamond in the rough. Well, to fit any more clichés into a sentence would not only be a crime against English majors everywhere but it would also be completely against my character. You see, I?m a letch; a down and dirty foul-minded letch. Let me explain a bit further?this girl and I, we work. I work up my approach, then initiate contact as a professional masseuse. It takes some work, along with some lingo I picked up from my aunt to get her to bite. After a long conversation, cautious questioning, and getting a feel for me, she schedules an appointment for Saturday.I use my time between now and then to borrow gear from my aunt again. On Saturday, I arrive at her place promptly. She lives in the city, twenty stories up in a highrise condo. I lug the table and other necessary items.
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