You have my Word.What's green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you?A pool table.Apparently, someone in London gets stabbed every 52 ...econds.Poor bastard.I went to a really emotional wedding the other day.Even the cake was in tiers.We have a genetic predisposition for diarrhea.Runs in our jeans.A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building.He yells "Don't do it! You have so much potential!"A hot blonde orders a double entendre at the bar.The bartender. "I was wonder if you have begun courting anybody yet," Lady Gordon said with a hint of discomfort. "Not as such, ma'am," Ian stammered. "I don't exactly get out much. I spend most of my time in the stables and don't often ride into town." "Surely some of the maids have approached you or tried to get you to step out with them." "Aye, ma'am. But, none of them have interested me. And I am a bit clumsy with the fairer sex. Why do you ask, ma'am?" "Well you know my husband has been neglecting his. I wasn't thinking." June? Did Raul talk to you about the ECP?" I'm sorry, John, I'm not thinking. ECP?" The emergency contraceptive pill. It's not foolproof, but it has about an 89% chance of preventing pregnancy. The sooner she gets it, the better the chances of prevention." Oh, my God. I didn't even think of pregnancy. What about AIDS?" I'm afraid that's a very definite possibility." Oh, my poor baby. She can't have AIDS. It's not right, John, it's just not right." Relax, June. We can test.. It was a year later that she phoned to say that she was going to have a baby, and six months after that to tell me that it was a boy, and that she’d insisted on naming him after me. But then, just a couple of months after that she’d phoned again. I could hardly make out what she was saying, except that she pleaded with me to come and see her, that she needed me. That was yesterday, and now I was on the train, wondering what I would find when I arrived. I wanted to see her desperately, but I.
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