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“Occupation?”“No, just here for a few days.”As the coffin was being lowered into the ground at a Parking Officer’s funeral, a voice from ins...descreams: “I’m not dead, I’m not dead. Let me out!”The Vicar smiles, leans forward, sucking air through his teeth and mutters, “Too late, mate, the paperwork’s already done.”I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night.Or “foreplay” as she likes to call it.After both suffering from depression for a while, me and the missus were going to. Damn, I’d always had to steal one of Dad’s before. Things were different out here, I guessed. Just HOW different was about to be revealed.Slim was a man of few words, maybe to compensate for living with five talkative women. After a long quiet spell, sipping his beer, he asked his guest, “What’s your favorite fucking position?”I nearly choked and didn’t know what to say. I didn’t have a favorite simply because I’d never fucked! Finally, I managed, “I like them all.”Slim continued, “All our. While not universal, some who head out onto the streets in the buff are very much aroused by some aspect of it (the embarrassment, the reactions, the exposure, etc.), whether they want to be or not. This can include such sexual displays as raging erections that leak precum, nipples erecting, or women's pussies getting wet.The more extreme negative reactions to this from onlookers range from calling the naked person a sex offending menace to pointing to it as proof that the new laws were. "What is it you wish to know," he asked me once Sonia was back in her inner office and the door was shut."Leave out the details of who and what but explain the rest to me and explain to me how you believe the punishment you are receiving matches the crime you committed," I told him and I set up my little voice recorder to catch every word.The interview took about half and hour and, breaking no confidences, 'Boy' told me how he had been at a loss for a senior theme, had been working a part-time.
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